Michele Womble - This Road

This Road

Song two from The Calling of a Priest

This Road. (Deut. 31:8, Matt. 28:20b). All of my songs are special to me, but “This Road” is special to me in a few unique ways. It is one of the few songs that I did not write in response to a passage I was reading (but there's still a passage!). Instead, it is a response to a dream I had when I was eleven, and to a book I read. The morning of January 21, 1980 I woke from a dream in which I had been walking with Jesus. We walked down a long road together, Jesus on my left, and He was explaining many things to me. Eventually the road became a bridge crossing a very wide river. The river was so wide that I could barely see the land on the other side. He continued explaining things to me, answering my questions, as we crossed. In the middle of the bridge, He turned and stood before me, and He was crying and smiling, and I was crying and smiling. And then I was awake.*

My understanding at the time, after I awoke, was that I would “see Him again” when I reached the other side of the bridge. And many times since I expressed to Him that I wish I was still in the dream, that He was “still here” - and I felt Him whispering back to me “I AM still here, I haven't gone anywhere”, and I would say “but it's not the same”. **

When I was in college, I realised the similarities between my dream and a beloved book by C.S Lewis, “The Horse and His Boy”, in particular the part where Shasta is walking through the mountain pass with Aslan on his left. (If you haven't read it, you need to, it's a wonderful book. My copy is well-worn.) And I wrote a song attempting to incorporate both experiences - Shasta's and my experience in my dream. The verses were really more about Shasta than about me and also not very good and I knew they needed to be re-written, that the song wasn't quite right. And then in January 2007 (in Novosibirsk) I wrote down in my journal what is now the first verse of the song. And then I wrote “Father, I feel startled. For years I've wanted to finish that song - and here I didn't even mean to, but it seems I've suddenly, unexpectedly finished it.”

The verses are now more about me than about Shasta, but I think that there are echoes of Shasta and Aslan and the mountain pass in the song. The chorus is the original chorus that I wrote while in college.

I wrote “I have forgotten You” because unfortunately I do forget sometimes, thought it seems impossible. I will realise in the middle of something that for a time I have forgotten to remember and it is with relief (and regret that I have forgotten) that I remember that I am never alone, however much it may feel that way sometimes, and that I am, as I long have been, on This Road that I walk down together with Him, on the road that leads me Home, to those hills I can remember waiting on the other side of the bridge, and finally, completely, to Him.

*I was both overjoyed and devastated when I woke.

**As I have gotten older, I have more and more received and grown into the truth that He really is “still here”.

This Road Lyrics

I have forgotten You

Though I never should forget

My feet have trod alone

But You have always directed my steps

I feel the silence around me

I feel the warmth of Your Breath

I don't know where I'm going or how far

But I know I'll get there yet.

Sometimes I feel I'm walking down this road all alone